A letter to my ex!!

You came to me at one of my most vulnerable times being deeply hurt by a man who only used me for sex then tossed me to the side like a piece of trash waiting to go down into the garbage disposal.

I thought I had found what true love was with you but the truth was not dealing with prior emotions led to me jumping head first into a pool of nothingness. Wanting so badly to be loved, taken care of that I couldn’t see past the fact that was glaring in my eyes like the sun on a hot day  you were never my one.

The accusations of cheating were a daily battle how much can one person take it’s like doing something every day with the expectation of the outcome changing all though it never does.

The expectation of this poor relationship became greater then the actual reality trying to force it to be a long lasting relationship. Every time  I said I love you it felt empty with no form I felt like I had to say it. If it doesn’t come naturally then it’s not a reality.

When you said you loved me it felt good for a fleeting moment then that passed as quickly as it came usually when someone says they love you aren’t you supposed to feel happy about it?!’ So why does it feel so sad and vacant

Eventually the cut of point came when I realised it just wasn’t working I needed time to reflect on this unstable foundation we tried to build a home with just mud and a couple of bricks and it wasn’t meant to work but it was a lesson indeed it was.

You were a wondrous lesson that not everything that glitters is gold and a sharp reminder that just because you’re a good person doesn’t mean you’re my blessing

Sincerely never bitter only stronger

Keshia rose 2016 (c)

 

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